This is a short story that will hook you until you sadly
finish the story and realize you read it too fast. This is a story that could
be turned into so much more, yet is perfect as is. The description is beautiful. So profound and poetic like
for a story. Everything planned well and emotions portrayed the best I can
imagine. The author’s talent is admirable.
It reeks of dedication, and is inspiring the vivid emotions
the author gives the characters so subtly. It is so poignantly mysterious and
stunning. The mystery drags you in to keep reading to understand what has
happen. Though, you wouldn’t keep reading if not for the writers amazing figurative
writing that is so gripping.
However, there are some spelling and grammatical errors that
need to be fixed. As beautifully and well done this story is, as perfect as it
may seem… It is not. Another thing I didn’t like was the switching of point of
views. It should have been just Leon who narrated. Also, the author needs to
add something in to separate the flashback from present day. It can be
confusing, but I still was able to follow it all.
In any case, I love the sad mystery and how indirect it is.
Makes you want to find out what Leon did and what happened to his sister. Even
though the author hints to us what happened, it still wasn’t outright direct in
telling us. This story could be so much more, makes you want to keep reading,
but you can be satisfied with this short story because it is packed with so
much talent.
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